Back to life, back to reality.

After 11 months of leisure (well not quite), this week I officially return back to the working world. 

Don't get me wrong, I am not going back full time, or in fact returning to my former place of work. I am joining a fresh new company, on a freelance basis, and in truth I could not be more excited.

It's interesting that my blogging has fallen to the bottom of my to do list the last few months, this makes me sadder I am sure than it makes you. In truth, I ran out of things to say, something I never could imagine possible.  At one stage I was blasting out three posts a day!

Harry has been as happy as Larry (thank goodness), his sleep is fine, bar a few nights here and there, his eating is good and his development generally is normal. I spend my days at various classes, sipping coffee with friends, cooking, cleaning, reading, and most importantly playing with my 8.5 month old little man. 

I have a great life, but it isn't exactly "newsworthy". I know that I am boring now. I am ok with that. 

I knew it the first time I met up with one of my very best friends, alone (Harry was with the hubs). After a few minutes of me updating her on Harry's development, followed by a few more minutes of video footage to back up what I'd told her (I am sure she was thrilled), she asked... "so what else?" At this point I went blank...

"What else?"

"There isn't anything else?!"

The reason for my lacklustre blogging performance of late isn't that I am too busy... come on... post 7pm I have plenty of time and it's not like I can go anywhere... the reason is that I am boring and have nothing to say!

Since sorting out this new job, I have found my voice again. I feel I have something to say. Please don't think me a terrible person, I love being a Mummy and wouldn't change it for the world. But a few hours here and there talking about other things has done me the world of good and for the first time in a while I feel like the old me. I feel like I am more than just Harry's mum and it feels good. No, it feels great.

I am by no means ready for full time employment, I just couldn't do that at this stage, but I feel blessed to have the best of both worlds. I feel confident and happy and like I bring more to the table than my gorgeous son. 

And hey, if nothing else, it's got me blogging again!

First after first

One of the greatest things about motherhood is the series of firsts we get to experience.

Some firsts are a little scary (the first night at home alone), some firsts are a little shocking (the first explosive poo), some firsts are ridiculously cute (the first time they get the hiccups), some are meaningful (the first time they look into your eyes and you know they know who you are) and some are just perfect... the first smile.

Now, it did take a while to distinguish between an actual smile and wind, but after a while, his eyes did the talking and we knew he was truly smiling at us... especially when his beautiful smile was met with a wee giggle... is there anything more amazing?

It's crazy how quickly time flies. Thinking back to "the early days" (which were only 8 weeks ago), it's unreal to think about the firsts that we not take for granted... the first time he fell asleep in my arms, the first time he cried a tear, the first bath.

Considering I am someone who has always sort of rushed through life, too excited about the next thing to truly appreciate the present... I am sort of surprised at how upset I am getting at how fast my little boy is developing.

He's now got an insatiable appetite, is incredibly long (even more noticeable as he was totally curled up for his first 3 weeks), his so alert and constantly smiles. 

We are a generation of photographs, videos and of course the Internet which provides the means for sharing every aspect of our lives. So much so, that it is almost impossible to live in the moment, I am sure that many people experienced their babies "firsts" through the lens of a camera or the glare of an iPhone. 

It's sad really.

Yes we get to document every second of every day, but I want to see and enjoy all these moments for what they are... before I know it he'll be all grown up and I'll be sat wondering where the time went.

Motherhood/parenthood really is so special. 

Let's not forget that.